Umendo Chapter 49

Umendo Chapter 49

I couldn't believe Faith, so I called Zandie straight away. Her phone was ringing but she wasn't picking it up. I knew she was off, so I got into the car and drove to her house. I didn't want to entertain this whole thing, because I would end up believing what Faith had said. So I played music on my way there and tried to block it all out. There must be an explanation for all this,Zandie could never do anything like this. And Siya? Could he be stupid enough to cheat again after what happened with Nicole? And impregnant Faith in less than a month when we had been trying for years? If Faith was truly pregnant, it was probably Didi's. There was absolutely no way she used condoms with him because there is no condom that fits his ntenene, no ways! These are all the things l kept replaying in my head, although I had told myself not to think too much into this before hearing what Zandie and Siya had to say. Before long I had arrived at Zandie's complex, the gate at their complex is a see through and you can see Zandie's house clearly from the gate.

I saw Siya's car parked behind Zandie's, what was he doing here? As l was about to ask the security guard to ring Zandie, l saw Siya and Zandie getting out of the house, Siya holding Zozo (Zandie's daughter) to his chest. They hugged briefly , Siya got into the car and rolled down the window to say something to Zandie. I quickly started the car and drove off. I didn't know what to think, why would Siya lie to me and say he is going to sort out some business whilst he was going to see Zandie. And see her for what behind my back, on top of that Zandie had ignored my calls. Zandie and Siya were never buddy buddies, they communicated through me, like Siya would ask how Zandie is if I had gone to lunch with her or something like that and Zandie was the same. If Siya ever called Zandie, it was to ask her to speak to me if he had done something wrong like the time I moved in with her when he cheated with Nicole, or if my phone isn't going through whilst Zandie and l are together. Could Faith have been telling the truth? I pulled up and called Siya
Siya: Hey baby, usharp?
Sme: Yeah, when are you coming back home?
Siya: I'm on my way, I won't be long. Why do you sound so down?
Sme: Where are you?
Siya: I was with Francis discussing discussing some things about the business
Sme: Really?
Siya: Ah baby, why would I lie to you?
I hung up on him, there it was! Pure lies...Why would Siya be calling Zandie, now visiting her and lying about it? So he was busy donating his sperm to Zandie and Faith whilst I was working hard making sure he took his vitamin supplements and cooking healthy meals to increase his sperm count. No wonder he couldn't get it up, how could he after sleeping with two other women. By the time he got to me, Mr Muscle would have had enough and probably tired. And he was probably thinking of Faith and Zandie ephuzu kwami, no wonder he couldn't concentrate enough to climax. Mnxx.. Men! Having a low sperm count didn't mean that he couldn't have children, his chances had probably gone up from 15% to 20% with those supplements, and what did he do? Download it all on Faith who doesn't even want to have a baby. And Faith said that she used protection with Didi, she always has female condoms, so she could have been using them since there is no size for Didi. I was done with all his lies and cheating. I drove back home and quickly packed two suitcases. I couldn't ask him to leave because I would literary have to drag him out of the house myself, and even if I managed to drag him out, I know for sure that he would come home everyday, even sleep outside the door to push the point across. I had to find my own place where I wouldn't find Siya waiting when I came back from work. I didn't want him to find me there, lest he beg me and tell me how sorry he is, make believable excuses like he did with the Nicole issue and I'd end up staying. This was the final straw. I left a note saying, "Goodbye, you won't have to sneak around anymore. Zandie or Faith, even both of them can move in now since one woman will never be enough for you!
PS: I AM FILING FOR DIVORCE!"

I switched off my phone before I left and l never looked back!

Umendo Chapter 48

Umendo Chapter 48

I couldn't bring myself to call umamazala, l knew she was going to let me have it on this one. She was probably going to say that me and my family were trying to kill her son. I had called Buhle to let her know about Siya on our way to the hospital and asked her to call uMaMoyo to let her know and other relatives because I really had no energy. So when she called me and said those words l was not surprised at all. I didn't stay on the phone to listen to more of her insults, I hung up on her, which l know is rude, but she was rude! She called me a few more times and l ignored her calls. Siya was admitted, I wanted to stay a bit longer by his side but they wouldn't let me. Zandie came early in the morning to help me clear up the mess oma beret had made. I searched our spare bedroom from top to bottom to make sure that there wasn't anything else illegal, I did not find anything. I packed Faith's clothes ready to be collected whenever she got out. I couldn't take them to Didi's flat since they were both in custody.l didn't want to hear my aunt crying, so l ask my mother to tell her about Faith's shenanigans. She offered to come and be with me for moral support, but I declined. The doctor who had attended to Siya had estimated that he could be discharged in less than two weeks if the scan revealed that he hadn't fractured any bones. So I wanted us to be alone for a while whilst we tried to recover from this ordeal. If MaMoyo wanted to visit Siya before he was discharged, she would have to stay with Buhle because I was not prepared for her, mentally. This time uzokhuluma iqiniso ma ethi ngimxotshile. Or I would go and stay with Zandie, she will stay at the house by herself. 

I discovered that some of my jewellery was missing from my jewellery box, those thieving bastards! Mnxxxx. A couple of women from the complex came over to 'check if l was ok'. When Siya got out, we would have to discuss moving away from this place, so many bad memories. We would rent it out until we finished paying the bond, then sell it. It's funny how a few bad memories can completely suppress many many good memories. As a person you can do many good deeds in your life, but the minute you make that one mistake, people forget all the thousand good things you have done and forever remember that one bad mistake you made. Life hey... When I told Langa and Mike about the recent events of my life, they proclaimed that my life was more scandalous than Scandal, the TV soap. I went to stay with Zandie, I was scared of being alone in that house; besides, I didn't want to find MaMoyo waiting for me like last time. If she wanted to see Siya, she would have to come after he was discharged. Things would be extremely tense with just the two of us. Either I would end up strangling her, or she would kill me first. 

Siya was recovering well, the swellings were coming down nicely, thank God he had no broken bones. He didn't like being in hospital, but then again, nobody does, he wanted to get out of there as soon as yesterday. Buhle called me one afternoon to tell me that uMaMoyo was coming over from ekhaya, I told her that I was staying with Zandie. She understood and said she would tell her to come and stay with her. I found them (Buhle and MaMoyo), two days later visiting Siya. 

I greeted them, Buhle got up and gave me a hug, MaMoyo looked at me and said nothing. So I greeted her again, this time specifically mentioning her, but she just kept her eyes on Siya and asked Siya something as if she hadn't heard me. Siya intervened and said "uyakukhulumisa uMeme mama, awumuzwa yini?". She sized me up and said "Yebo", then went back to her conversation with Siya. I couldn't stay with all that tension, so l told Siya that I would visit later and went back to work. When I visited him, I told him about what his mother had said to him, but he said it was just probably stress and frustration. He told me that he didn't blame me for what had happened, for l knew nothing about Faith and Didi's dealings, he also said that he was going to have a word with his mother. I asked him to let me know when his mother was visiting so that l could come at an alternative time, I really couldn't stand her anymore. I wanted to make sure I didn't find myself in the same room as her because even if she didn't say anything with her mouth, she said a lot with her expressions. 

A day before Siya was due to be discharged, I went home to prepare for his return. He came back on a Thursday, so I took the day off work. I cooked a lovely meal for him and got some candles and flowers. It was great to have my husband back home in one piece, I would have never been able to live with myself if something had happened to him. I hadn't heard anything from Faith, I tried to call her but her phone wasn't going through. I wanted to find out what was going on with her because my aunt was very worried and she wanted to know if she had been charged, she told me that she had heard nothing from her. Maybe she had died in those cells or in prison, and nobody had come forward to claim her body. I needed to find out for my aunt's sake. I wanted Siya to be discharched first before I started adding more stress to my already stressful life. So since Siya had been discharged, I was going to go find out about Faith the coming Monday. Siya was very happy to be home, we stayed up cuddling and catching up on our TV programmes. The following day, he brought up the issue of moving out as if he had read my mind. We both agreed to look for a place and move out of the complex. There was no sex or anything, just kissing, cuddling and spooning. I couldn't complain really, I felt very blessed to have him back. 

I was ironing on a Saturday afternoon when l heard a knock. Siya had gone to sort our some business with Francis. I assumed it was Zodwa or someone from the complex, I got up to open the door but umuntu wavela wazingenela because the door wasn't locked. It was Faith! I wasn't interested in finding out how she had gotten out who had gotten her out, I just wanted her to take imitshaqana yakhe and go! I was going to call aunty after she had left to tell her not to worry about Her.

Sme: Go and get it your stuff it's in the spare bedroom. Don't ever come back here again, you have caused us so much pain. My husband nearly died because of you!

Faith: I told you, I had nothing to do with those drugs! I swear I knew nothing! 

Sme: Yeah right! Just leave please! 

Faith: Can I stay for a week please whilst I sort myself out. It will only be one week, nothing more

Sme: You must be joking, you cannot seriously be asking to stay here after everything you have put us through!

Faith: Evie bantu, I swear I had nothing to do with that (She started sobbing) 

Sme: Your crocodile tears won't change anything, just leave please. 

Faith: I have nowhere to go right now...( still crying) And Didi wants nothing to do with me, he thinks I set him up. 

Sme: I don't care what Didi thinks, or whatever is going on with you. You cannot stay here, my husband won't like finding you here. So yenza uhambe ( she ran to the toilet still crying and she vomited violently....I hoped she wasn't ill) 

Faith: (She finished throwing up) Please Sme, you have to believe me, I had nothing to do with those drugs, I don't know how they got there. Maybe you should ask Siya

Sme: You should be ashamed of yourself! Do l look stupid to you? Why did they suddenly appear when you moved in with us? ( I took her suitcase to the door to show her I meant business)

Faith: (She stopped crying and had a devilish look on her) Did Siya tell you that wangimithisa? Is that why lingixotsha? 

Sme: Huh? What are you talking about? 

Faith: You heard me, I am PREGNANT! I am carrying Siya's baby. Don't even suggest it's Didi's because I fell pregnant when I moved in with you, and besides, I always use protection with Didi. I didn't with Siya. 

Sme: (I just stood there with my mouth dry, lost for words. I didn't know what to think or say) Ini....???

Faith: Yes, your 'perfect' husband is not so perfect after all is he? And to save you time of trying to find out who the other woman is, I will tell you. It's your dear friend Zandie. He is sleeping with her. Those calls you saw on his call logs were not by me, they were made by him! I have never called Zandie! 

Sme: No......, this can't be happening.Why? Why?

Faith: Don't worry, I will have an abortion. I don't want to bring shame into our family (as if she hadn't done that already), plus, I am not ready for kids. I have a life to live! (She picked up her bags and left!) 

Umendo Chapter 47

Umendo Chapter 47

I woke up in a pool of water surrounded by familiar faces from the complex, Zodwa had my head in her arms.Somebody was calling the ambulance. I quickly felt my whole body for the gunshot wound, I was not bleeding and the only pain I felt was at the back of my head when I fell and landed on the ground and on my chest, where Chief had kicked me. Oh God, this only meant one thing, they had shot my husband! I got up, and stumbled into the house to check my husband. There was someone in the kitchen filling up a dish with water, probably to splash it on me. There was no one in the living room, the floor was wet, I quickly surveyed the rest of the house and there was no one. I wept! What had they done with Siya? I asked Zodwa what had happened to Siya, she told me that they took him with them. They had poured cold water onto him to wake him up and dragged him into one of their vans. So who had been shot then? Zodwa showed me the hole on our front door, they had shot the door. I don't know if it was to get me to open the door or if that bullet was meant for me. I got sick to my stomach, I knew I had to do something about my husband before they finished him off if they hadn't already. Zodwa told me that they said they were taking him to Norwood Police Station. 

I called Faith! It had to be her and Didi's drugs. I had let her into our house not knowing she was going to bring us so much pain. Her phone was not going through, I didn't have Didi's number so I was stuck. I put on some dry clothes and took my handbag to go to the police station. I was going to tell them who the drugs belonged to. I just hoped my husband was still alive. The whole place was upside down, I opened the drawer in the wardrobe where we kept emergency cash so I could bail Siya out if they agreed. It was gone! R5 000, all of it! Those thieves, those bastards! I knew wasn't going to get it back. Zodwa offered to drive me to the police station but I declined, she insisted so l ended up letting her drive me there. I don't know if it was out of sympathy or if she wanted to gobhoza to the rest of the complex when she got back. Whatever it was, I didn't care much at that point, I just wanted my husband back home. 

We got there and they wouldn't let me see him. I told them about Faith and her boyfriend. They asked for her number and I gave it to them. They called her but it wasn't going through, so they said I should take them to Didi's place. I had only been there twice, I feared that I wouldn't remember the place, worse it was at night. He lived eYouville, so it wasn't that far from the police station. They were three squad cars and a van. About 12 berets. Chief was there as well, I wanted to spit on him, but I knew what was best for me and my husband. When we got there, the security guard let us in, that made me think. Who had let them into our complex because Lindo leaves around 8pm and he doesn't live in our complex? They banged on the door, but nobody opened, so they broke in. They searched the whole flat and found a huge ward of cash, it had to be nothing less than R70 000, about a dozen passports, tablets, laptops and phones. They took them all! I asked Chief if he was going to let my husband go, but he said that they weren't going to let him go because for all they knew my husband was working with Didi and Faith! What? Are you kidding me? I asked him to let him out so he couldn't get some medical attention at least, but he refused saying he could skip the country. He even refused bail and said I had to go apply in court for bail. Oh nkosi yam bantu! I called our lawyer to find out what our options were but he wasn't picking up his phone. I was stuck! . 

When we got downstairs, I asked the security guard if he had seen Didi and Faith. He told me that they had left the flat about an hour earlier, he said they had probably gone to eGuest House/ Palace, a club in Youvillle. Chief was listening, so we went there. I prayed that we would find them there. We got there around 1am. I went in with two berets, we scoured the place but I couldn't find them. I went to the ladies toilets and I found Faith there with one of her friends putting make up on. I pulled her out to boma beret and said to her "tell them that you are the one who stashed those drugs in my house and where Didi is". She looked at me confused, but I wasn't buying it! I wanted to slap the hell out of her, how dare she! They took her outside, everyone in the club was watching, some people even followed us outside. They asked her where Didi was, she hesitated a little. Bad mistake cos one beret backhanded her so hard she stumbled and fell to the ground with her hand rubbing where she had been slapped. I think it dawned on her that these people meant business, because she quickly got up and went sober there and then! She told them that she knew nothing and that  Didi had left soon after buying her drinks, he had gone to collect something in Hilbrow with one of his friends. She showed them Didi's car which was parked on the side. They told her to call Didi and tell him to get back ASAP, but not to tell him anything about them. Lucky enough Didi picked up and said they were already on their way back. We waited for him in the car, he arrived about 10 minutes later. They went straight to him as soon as he arrived and searched the car. They found more money and about 500g of white powder. If that wasn't evidence enough for them to let my husband go, I don't know what was. They arrested both of them and Faith. I followed them to the station with Zodwa. Apparently Didi and his friends had refused to say anything without a lawyer, and Didi had told Faith not to say anything either. Around 3am they let Siya out, he couldn't walk properly. He had to hold onto the walls for balance, his face was swollenand covered in blood l could hardly recognise him. His hands were swollen as well, Zodwa and l helped him to the car. We didn't get an apology or anything, Chief just said, "next time know who you let into your house". 

We took Siya to the hospital, it brought back memories of when he got stabbed just less than six months back. I was just glad that he was still alive. I received a text message from Faith saying "I am so sorry for what happened, but l swear l had nothing to do with the drugs". Yeah right! When I got off the phone with Zandie, l received a call from umamazala. Before I could even greet her she screamed "Wena mthakathi wezigodo, lifuna ukubulalisa umntanami! You failed to kill him last time, now you want to finish him!"

Umendo Chapter 46

Umendo Chapter 46

That smile accompanied with a piercing gaze said it all, it was that sort of villian smile you see in the movies. The Afrikaner guy whom I gathered was the chief of that operation whacked Siya on his face so hard with his gun, I swear I heard a cracking sound, probably his jaw. Siya's body went flying across the sofa and he landed the top half of his body on top of the coffee table. His nose was bleeding, I screamed running towards my husband to help him up. One of them pulled me away, no he yanked me away from Siya, I stumbled a little to get some balance. Chief walked slowly towards Siya, he light a cigarette, I don't know why but I screamed, "No Smoking In My House!". He looked at me, with that piercing gaze and that wry smile, inhaled the smoke of his cigarette and blew it towards me, then pressed the lit part of his cigarette onto Siya's arm. He let out a muffled scream and I cried out for the chief to stop hurting him. The other boma beret were still ransacking our house in search of "the drugs" that we knew nothing about. Chief kicked Siya on his head and l went flying towards him,crying for him to stop. One beret held me, I tried to break free from him but his grip was so tight and firm l couldn't even wiggle. He kept kicking him everywhere and stumping on him saying "we are not leaving here without what we came for you kak, ...you bastard", l was sobbing uncontrollable, It killed me seeing my husband being assaulted like that, and worse by officers of the law. Siya was groaning in pain, oh bantu, my poor Siya. As if he hadn't suffered enough when he got stabbed. I was praying silently that they finish the search quickly, that way they would stop beating Siya. I'd rather they locked us up whilst they were doing their investigation than abuse us like that! Now another beret had joined Chief, they were both kicking him, their boots were covered in blood. I knew Siya wasn't going to make it if they kicked him one more time.He was using his hands to block the kicks, eventually he stopped trying to protect himself. He had stopped making any sounds, I knew he had passed out.

 I prayed that they wouldn't shoot him and finish him up. At some point, which to me felt like forever, they stopped kicking Siya, Chief came towards me, l had stopped kicking and screaming . I was on the floor sobbing so hard it felt like my guts had been ripped out of my stomach.I had never cried so much and so hard until that day. At that point I didn't care if they beat me up or shot me, I had never despiced someone so much as l did this Afrikaner chief. He said to me "since that kak of your husband won't tell us anything, maybe you will". I was kneeling on the floor with my eyes fixed on his bloodied boots, "my husband's blood", I thought to myself. He told me to get up and look at him, I stayed on the floor. Not to defy him or anything, I just didn't have the energy, my knees were weak, it felt as if all my bones had been removed and l had been left limp. My tears were falling onto the tip of his boot, washing off the blood. I crawled past him to get to Siya kanti angibuzanga elangeni! He kicked me on my chest flipping me upside down! I bit my tongue so hard I tased the blood gushing from my tongue. I hit the floor with the back of my head and everything went a bit fuzzy for a few seconds. I blinked rapidly to get my vision back. As l was trying to lift up my head, he placed his boot on my forehead. I knew he wouldn't hesitate to crush my head, I had to think of something fast. I had to stay alive for my husband, or what was left of him. I blurted out "Lumkile!". She was the only person l could think of who could have had a hand in all this. She had probably planted something somewhere, in one of Siya's driving school cars probably and tipped them off or something. Eish, that woman! Even after she hac found out that Siya wasn't the father of Nicole's baby, she was still going out of her way to make us suffer. For what? Talk about misguided anger! Or maybe she was mad that l helped Nicole, yeah, that also made sense since she wanted her to suffer for what she did. Or maybe it was because I demanded that she paid me back what had taken from us, so she thought she would get back at us by this? Or maybe it was all the above. Chief still with his boot on my forehead said "Lumi..khile..., what?". Before l could say anything, one beret came out of our spare bedroom and said "found something". Chief moved away from me to see what had been found, I sat up and looked towards them. The beret handed a packet which could have roughly been 2kgs with white powder in it, and a ward of cash. You should have seen the shock in my eyes! What was that doing in our house? 

Chief looked at me, this time his eyes were so full of anger! I knew from his look that he was going to beat me to death. I got up so quick and ran for the door, one of the berets came after me but he missed me by a second, I closed our front door shutting them in and I screamed. I wanted to wake up everyone in the complex so that they would witness my death, and probably my husband's too. I wasn't going to die without a fight! I was pulling the door handle with both of my hands whilst screaming "he....lp.......Nampo besibulala bo, ..... He.......lp!".I saw a few light come on, and l heard a few couple of doors being opened. I was going back and forth with whoever was behind the door pulling to open it. Then I heard "pha..aaaa". A gunshot! I fell to the ground and everything went black.....!

Umendo Chapter 45

Umendo Chapter 45

Siya and Zandie only communicate every now and then, like when there is a crisis or something like that. So naturally I was surprised to see outgoing calls from Siya to Zandie. "Baby, lihlanganisani loZandie?" I asked him. "Why do you ask?", he replied. I told him why I was asking. Before he could react and reply, Faith said that she is the one who had been calling Zandie using Siya's phone because she had no airtime. She told me that she had asked her ukuba amzwele umsebenzi, so she used Siya's phone a few times to call her about a couple of job vacancies. Phew.....I felt stupid and silly for even asking him that. Maybe I was becoming too paranoid, that's what being cheated on does to you. You are always on guard, you become a detective, always on the look out for anything and everything. Once that trust is lost, it takes forever to build it up again, and even when you've built it again, it's never the same. I was ashamed though that Siya's infidelity had reduced me to even entertaining the thought that my friend, my closest friend who had been there for me through it all could even look at My husband that way. I was glad though that I had been calm and collected when I asked him. 

Faith got a job and asked to stay for a month to get her first pay then move out. She worked different shifts five days a week. When she was off, she went over to Didi's. Siya was still not able to perform in bed, he would either go flat way too early, or go on forever when he had a drink. He kept postponing going to the men's clinic. It was all frustrating, but l tried to stay strong and positive. I was against him drinking, but he argued that it was too much to expect him to not drink any alcohol at all for heaven knows how long. So we ended up compromising that he could have a drink once a week. One Saturday, Siya and l went to collect my car, Faith had gone over to Didi's. We met up with Zandie and Francis for dinner to celebrate my new car. We arrived home around 8pm. 

Around 10pm when we were sleeping, we heard a very loud knock. We both looked at each other puzzled. We could hear footsteps around the house, "open up or we will kick this door in", a male voice said. I put on my morning gown, Siya put on a t-shirt and went to open the door. When we got to the door, the same voice said, "This is your last warning. It's the police,  open up or we will break in". Siya unlocked the door and opened it slowly, one of them pushed the door wide open with his boots and with a gun pointed right at Siya. It was oma beret! The ones who wear red berets and look like soldiers. There were about 15 of them wearing bullet proof vests, they pushed their way through all of them with guns pointed at us, we moved back into the living room walking backwards. I have never been so scared in my life, I had been scared when Siya was stabbed, but this! This was on a whole new level! I have heard stories about how ruthless oma beret are, in fact Siya once told me a story about a guy he knew. The guy was one of two suspects in a high jacking shooting. They went to his place where they found him sleeping with his girlfriend, they beat him so hard before asking him about the gun he had used for shooting the victim, then they asked his girlfriend where the gun was. When she told them that she knew nothing, they beat her up too breaking her jaw and knocking out three of her teeth. Whilst they were interrogating them, the accomplice knocked at the door not knowing that he was walking into a death trap. They opened the door and saw that it was the other suspect, the suspect realised what was going on, he tried to run but they shot him more that seven times. He died on the spot. The other suspect seeing this, told them where the gun was. Lapho ke they beat him to a pulp. He was unconscious when they dragged him to their car to take him to the police station where he died fours later. They wrote on their report that he had gotten in a fight with one of cell mates in the holding cells. So as you can imagine, l was scared shitless. I could tell that Siya was terrified as well, he was shaking! 

We were cornered against the wall in the living room by two of them, the rest were walking around the house searching for God knows what. It all seemed surreal. Then one of them, a tall white Afrikaans middle aged guy came over to us and said, "so, where are they?". We looked at each other puzzled, then he said "The drugs! Were are the drugs?!" 

Umendo Chapter 44

Umendo Chapter 44

"Ahem ahem", l coughed a little to alert them of my presence. Faith jumped from his lap and there he was. It was Didi, Faith's supposedly ex boyfriend. He only had his vest on, so he too jumped to put his trousers on. I turned my face away from him but obviously not quick enough because l saw his ntenene. Heeeeh (clap once). Ok, I had only ever been with Siya, so I could not say l had great knowledge with penises. But we live in a digital world, where social networking has been taken to another level, so l have seen a fair amount of penises in these networking platforms, especially Whatsapp. Who here can raise their hand and say they have never received a dirty viral picture or video? I had seen a quite a few that I had an idea what the average size is, so when I saw that ntenene I was speechless. Well, l was speechless at the whole scene, but seeing that.....,I was really speechless. How can I best describe it....? My biggest toe is bigger than what I saw. It literally ended where it started! What was Faith even doing straddling him? Was she going to put it in together with his balls? Because that's the only way she would be able to feel that there was something inside her. Some people say that size doesn't matter, you just have to find a position that works for you. I had no other experience besides Siya, so l believed that, but now, now that I had seen Didi's ntenene, I knew right then that size matters. Imagine if l went from Siya to him, no matter how many ice blocks I shove down my honey pot, I could never be satisfied by him. Maybe it would have been fine if I had never been with someone else, but hayi... lokhuyana, even if you have never been with anyone else ngeke usuthiseke. Vele I don't think you can even break anyone's virginity with that. How do you even give him a hand job because it would disappear in your hand and probably squash it. I know that it's not his fault shame, he was born that way, but eish. If Faith dated him with the hope to find a monster pipe underneath those expensive trousers, shem wabhampa! Whoever said Nigerians are well endowed clearly hadn't met Didi. Is there even a condom that fits him? I highly doubt it. 

Anyhow, I looked away and walked back outside, I don't know why I went outside instead of the bedroom or kitchen, maybe I needed some fresh air after what I had seen. To be honest, I was so relieved it wasn't Siya, but I was pissed that Faith was doing her business in the living room. Couldn't they do it at his place? A couple of minutes later Didi came outside with so much embarrassment he couldn't even walk properly, it was as if he was carrying a bucket in between his thighs and didn't want to drop it. He couldn't look me in the eye, he apologised for what they did and said his goodbyes. It's true that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, phela if you saw Didi, how tall he was, how smart he always dressed and the car he drives, you could never imagine that he has an excuse for a penis. No offence to you guys who are in Didi's boat. It's true ukuthi uNkulunkulu akakunikezi konke shem. Back in the house Faith's eyes were wandering all over the place as if she was looking for something she had lost

Sme: Really Faith? Here I was thinking you are busy looking for a job. Is this what you do everyday when we are at work? 

Faith: No, I really have been looking for a job. I have never brought any guy here

Sme: Having sex in the living room pho?

Faith: We were not having sex

Sme: You were going to if I hadn't arrived, weren't you?

Faith: (Zwi yena)

Sme: And I thought you had broken up with Didi?

Faith: Yes we had, he has been calling me these past few days trying to get us back together. So he came to drop me off today after my job hunt. One thing led to another, I'm sorry you had to see that

Sme: I don't have the energy to argue with you, please don't do it again

Faith: It won't happen again. I promise.... I hope you are not traumatised by what you saw

Sme: Oh l am alright

Faith: I know you are thinking why do I stay with him when he doesn't even have .., you know

Sme: Ah, I didn't say anything mina

Faith: I laughed the first time l saw it you know. I was tipsy, so l laughed so hard, put my clothes on and left. When he called me, I told him to stop wasting my time because he could never satisfy me. He didn't give up, he was such a gentleman, eventually l gave in. The first time we got together, he made me cum  three times just from foreplay, so I didn't need to be penetrated to be satisfied. Yes, I hardly felt his thing inside me when he got on top of me, he thrust in and out less than ten times before he came. So that's what we always do, he gives me the best orgasms with foreplay, then goes inside me for his release. He is very nice to me, and he treats me better than any other guy l have ever been with, so that's why I have stayed with him for all this time

Sme: Ok, so long you are happy, that's all that matters. 

Faith: Yah neh!

Sme: Yeah, so does this mean you are moving in back with him? 

Faith: No, I want to find a place of my own, it's high time I became independent. I want to find a job and do something tangible with my life. Going back to live with him will just make me lazy because he does everything for me. 

Sme: That's the spirit, I hope you will find a job soon

Faith helped me prepare dinner and she joined me in my car hunt. I saw a car that I liked, so l put down a deposit for it. I was going to come back with Siya so he could see it and test drive it too before I paid the balance. 

After we finished eating, I asked to use Siya's phone to call Zandie because I had no airtime. When I finished speaking to Zandie, the phone went straight to the call logs. 

Zandie's name appeared more than six times on the call log. This was the first time I had ever called Zandie on Siya's new phone, so why did she appear on the log so many times? 

Umendo Chapter 43

Umendo Chapter 43

We couldn't pull the duvet to cover us up quick enough, Faith just stood there and said "oh, trying to make a baby are we?". Heh (clap once), the nerve of that girl. She said that she was cold and wanted to ask for an extra blanket. I don't know if she had genuinely forgotten that we kept all our extra blankets in the spare bedroom where she slept or if it was because she had quite a lot to drink. I told her where to get the extra blanket and told her to learn some manners. She apologised and left. As soon as Faith closed the door, Siya asked me if l had told Faith about his problem. I told him that I hadn't, he didn't seem to believe me because he asked me why Faith made that statement about making a baby. It was probably coincidental because I had never told her about any of my marital problems. Needless to say, Siya's spirits were dampened and Mr Muscle didn't get excited for the rest of the night. 

Before we both left for church, l went to have a little chat with Faith

Sme: Faith, we need to talk

Faith: Oh oh, sounds like you are breaking up with me. I have a massive headache right now, can we talk about whatever it is when you get back from church?

Sme: No, it cannot wait. I let you come stay with us out of the goodness of my heart, I didn't have to, but I did. You have caused chaos ever since you got here and l'm afraid you cannot stay with us any longer. You have to find some place else to stay otherwise we will end up fighting till no point of return. 

Faith: Wow, I've not been here a week and you already chucking me out to the streets? Where am l supposed to go?

Sme: To your friends or something, l don't know. You have a lot of friends right?

Faith: Yes, but none of them are in positions to offer me a place to stay

Sme: Usukhulile Faith, l'm sure you will make a plan

She looked at me with so much sadness, l felt guilty, but she had to go. After church l found a missed call from my aunt (Faith's mum, my father's sister) and another from my mother. I called my mother first. She told me that ubabakazi had called her asking her to speak to me ukuthi ngingaxotshi uFaith because she doesn't have anywhere else to go. I told my mother about Faith's lack of manners, she understood but pleaded with me to let her stay for another week before she moved out like she had said. I called my aunt who is very sweet and down to earth, it's hard to believe that Faith came out of her womb. I guess it true that umfundisi kazizali. My aunt begged me to let her stay for a few more days. She told me that she was going to borrow some money and send it for Faith's first month rent whilst she was looking for a job, but I told her not to worry about the rent money, I was going to give her the money. I wasn't doing it for her, l was doing it for my aunt, shame my poor aunt. When we arrived home after church, we found Faith cooking and the house was clean. I was pleasantly surprised, ok the meal was below par, but it was the effort that counted. Siya went to Yoeville after we finished eating. I told Faith about my conversation with her mother. I told her to look for a job and she said that she was going to start marketing  the next day. 

Siya came back later in the evening tipsy, I was beginning to get worried. He was supposed to lay off alcohol whilst we were trying to conceive in order to increase his sperm count. I didn't want to start and argument with him, so l just kept quiet. In bed that night, Siya didn't do much foreplay, just a kiss here and a kiss there then he was on top of me. It felt awkward because I was not used to this, Mr Muscle was fully loaded, but I can't say my honey pot was happy to welcome Mr Muscle. I tried to focus on foreplay a while longer, but he just wanted to go straight in. It was tricky because I didn't want to say anything that could knock his confidence down and risk him goimg flaccid again, so I just opened my legs. I could feel that he was very tense and was focusing on staying hard for as long as possible that he forgot to enjoy it all. After a minute of Mr Muscle pumping in and out, my honey pot went dry. I wasn't enjoying it at all, I just wanted him to cum quickly and get off me. He was now groaning, not the pleasure type, but the groaning one does when they are lifting up something heavy. The whole thing felt laboured. Three minutes gone and the friction was killing me. It felt as if somebody was rubbing the hottest chilli in there. I put some of my saliva down there very now and again, but it would dried up after a couple of thrusts. We didn't have any baby oil or lube on our night stands because we had never needed them before. Five minutes later, now I was moaning in pain, I guess Siya mistook it as pleasure moaning because he turned me over and went harder. It was cold but he was sweating, some of his sweat dripping onto to me. Seven minutes later, he was still pounding me mercilessly. I could tell that he was getting frustrated that he was nowhere near cuming, he was overthinking it. Ten minutes later, my vajay jay felt like someone had added fire onto the hot chilli. Twelve minutes later l collapsed onto the bed, l couldn't take it anymore. Siya got off me ephufuzela, I was praying that he wouldn't want to try again in a different position. He said "l'm sorry love, angazi kwenzakalani ngami". I told him not to worry, that we were going to be ok before l went to splash some cold water to cool down the fire that was burning in between my thighs. I felt sore, I hoped that Siya wouldn't want to try again anytime soon. I needed some time off to recover. Mr Muscle got excited again twice during the night as we were spooning, but Siya didn't try to get some. Yuu, l was relieved shem. 

The next morning, Faith woke up early and got ready to go job hunting. I dropped her off where she was going to get ama taxi. The next few days, Siya tried to get some but I told him l was on my period. I wasn't, I was still sore from that night. Faith was leaving early in the morning with us to go job hunting. One day I got off work early because I wanted to go look for a car to buy. I went home first to cook, there was a car parked in front of our house. The radio was on, but not to loud. I opened the front door slowly, as l walked past the kitchen, l saw an empty bottle of wine on the the kitchen top. In the exact same spot where I found Siya and Nicole, was Faith with only her nickers on sitting on some guy's lap. She was straddling him with her body facing away from me, so l couldn't see who the guy was from I was standing. 

Umendo Chapter 42

Umendo Chapter 42

I had a better night's sleep that night. I didn't care much about sex, l was just happy to be in my husband's arms. Even though he hadn't said anything, just that small act of affection meant a lot to me. It gave me a little bit of hope. I woke up early to make a full English breakfast for him, l wanted to remind him of the little things that mattered and I also show him that we could still do 'us' even with a visitor around. We had breakfast together before we both left for work. The mood seemed a bit lighter and he gave me a kiss goodbye. We gave Faith Siya's key since he usually gets home after me. 

I invited Siya to join me for lunch that afternoon and he agreed. Things were still awkward because l didn't want to say anything to upset him, so because of that, l had to carefully choose what l say and how l say it. Nevertheless, it was a good lunch. When I got home I found Faith watching TV still in her pyjamas, the sink was full of dirty dishes that she had used from morning and she had mis-placed things in the kitchen. One of my pet peeves is people who put things where they didn't find them, I hate having to hunt for things when l could easily get them if they are kept in their usual place. If you found it in the top right cupboard, return it in the top right cupboard. Not in the fridge, not it the left drawer, not under the sink, but in the top right cupboard. It just makes life a little bit easier and saves a whole lot of time and unnecessary arguments and headache. 

Sme: Faith! 

Faith: Evie....

Sme: No, don't Evie me, I don't know if you had a maid over at your place, but here you clean up after yourself

Faith: Oh,l meant to do that. Yikuthi bengisabheke iRhythm City

Sme: Iqale nini ukudlala the whole day iRhythm City? You had time to cook and eat but you had no time to clean up after yourself? Hayi no, you are going to have to pull your weight around here

Faith: Ok ok, keep your wig on! Jeez, it's only dishes for goodness sake. One would think I killed someone or something....Tjoo!

Sme: Don't make me regret inviting you in Faith,  go wash up please. I need to cook! 

Faith: Ok, ima kancane iRhythm City iyaphela in 15 minutes

Sme: Heeh! (Shaking my head) 

I didn't have time to wait, so l went and washed up and cleared the mess Faith had made and started cooking.  I was already regretting agreeing to let her stay with us. When Rhythm City leyo finished playing, she came to the kitchen and said "Hawu, ingani bengishilo nje ngathi l will wash up after Rhythm City?". I just looked at her and said nothing, I didn't want to say something l would later regret. She went back to the living room to watch something else. I later discovered that she put up a status on FB and Whatsapp saying "Yekel'ukuba serious. Phola sisi". Maybe l had overreacted a bit, but who wants to come home from work to find the kitchen in a state ngomuntu who spent the whole day at home doing absolutely nothing besides watching TV? A grown ass woman for that matter! Hayi no man! I'm sure if Siya had come home before l did and found the place like that, he wouldn't have been happy either. After we finished eating, Siya helped me clear up, I washed the dishes whilst he dried sizixoxela nje when Faith joined us. She asked me what the house rules were so that "something like today never happened again" as she put it. Siya looked at me to ask what had happened, l told him it was not a big deal, he shouldn't worry himself about that. I told Faith to clean up after herself and remember that she was sharing the house with other people. I knew that that was her way of apologising. Siya and l went to bed quite early that night as we wanted to wake up early to go car hunting. I asked Faith if she wanted to join us but she declined and said she had people to see. 

That night as we were spooning, Siya pulled me closer to him and said "thank you for everything baby, I am one the luckiest guys alive". I turned around and kissed him and fell asleep with a smile. That Saturday morning, Siya asked me to join him in the shower. I was a big reluctant, I knew that 'Mr Muscle' as we called him, would get excited. I feared that if he went flaccid again before doing the did, things would go back to where they were. I felt that we were making some progress and didn't want things to go south again. In the end I thought, "oh well, we will have to try again at some point, so might as well". I joined him, and less than a minute in the shower, Mr Muscle showed himself up. I was a bit nervous, so was he. He pulled me closer to him and kissed me like he had never kissed me before, I got all excited and wrapped my arms around him. He pulled my legs apart, licking me all over... Then there was a knock. Ah, l had forgotten about Faith there for a second. She desperately needed the toilet. Eish, talk about timing. Siya had already finished anyway, so he quickly put something on and left. She didn't even apologise, mnxx.  We spent the whole day car hunting, even though we didn't get what we wanted, it was a good day in general. Siya cracked a few jokes, and we didn't run out of things to talk about. We got some take away because we were both knackered. Faith wasn't home when we arrived. She arrived just as we finished eating with two bottles of wine and a pizza. She told me that she had gone out on a date. She offered us some wine but we both declined 

Faith: Hawu bantu, it's just wine. One glass won't kill you

Sme: No, we are fine Fefe

Faith: Siya uyakhulunyelwa? Don't you have your own mouth? Uyakshaya yini uEvie?Loosen up people!

Siya: Hahah, hayi..,ok, just one glass then

That one glass turned to two, two to three till they had finnished the whole two bottle. Here I was declining to have a glass in support of Siya, but he goes and drinks a whole bottle of wine. I was pissed off shem. 

I went to bed and Siya followed me, he was tipsy and all over me as soon as he closed our bedroom door. He said "shall we pick up where we left off", even though I was pissed off I didn't declined. He touched me at all the right places, so did l, he got on top of me and I helped him guide Mr Muscle in. Things were looking and feeling good, just when we were really getting into it, Faith knocked and let herself in at the same time before we could say anything! 

Umendo Chapter 41

Umendo Chapter 41

When I woke up the next morning, Siya was sleeping in the spare bedroom. He joined me in the kitchen when l was making breakfast. I asked him why he slept in the spare bedroom and he told me that he got into the house late, so he didn't want to disturb me in my sleep. "Njenganini Siya?", l asked him. He just kept quiet and went to take a shower. I shook my head in disappointment and anguish. It broke my heart to see him like that, what made it even worse was that l couldn't help him. I wanted to, but he just kept shutting me out. That made me gloomy, Langa and Mike had noticed, I guess l couldn't hide my sadness. I met up with Zandie for lunch, I needed someone to talk to, maybe l was approaching this whole thing from a wrong angle. I needed someone else's perspective. Zandie looked glowing

Sme: Heheh, is there a little bun in the oven or have you met someone?

Zandie: Hahahah, why mfazi?

Sme: You are glowing, like the time you were pregnant

Zandie: Hahah, hayi suka! 

Sme: Have you met someone? 

Zandie: Kinda...

Sme: I knew it! Well, at least one of us is happy. Tell me all about him

Zandie: One of us? Is there trouble in paradise? Is that why you look depressed? 

Sme: I wouldn't say depressed, but yes, there is trouble in paradise

Zandie: What has he done this time? Hayi Siyabonga nkosi yam! 

Sme: (I explained everything to her)

Zandie: Tjoo, that's a tough one mfazi. Try to convince him to go to the men's clinic

Sme: I mentioned it and he said he said he would go, but l doubt that he will

Zandie: Qina ngomthandazo mfazi

Sme: I know l should, but l am ashamed to say that my faith is weak lately. It's not that l have lost my faith, it's just that when it comes to praying, I just don't know what to say anymore. Maybe l feel like l have said everything there is to say....hayi, l don't know anymore mfazi. It's really stressing me out

Zandie: Shame mfazi, I don't know what to say. But l will keep you in my prayers. Don't worry too much, kuzolunga. 

Sme: (deep sigh) Anyway, enough about me, tell me about this new guy responsible for this lovely glow

Zandie: Ermm..

(My phone rang, it was my cousin Faith)

Sme: Fefe

Faith: Evie (Evelyn is my middle name, Faith is one of the few people who used it)

Sme: How are you my long lost khazi

Faith: Not good l'm afraid

Sme: Kutheni?

Faith: I broke up with Didi (Faith's on and off boyfriend) and l don't have a place to stay. 

Sme: Ohhh

Faith: Can l come and crush with you until next month please. I'm stranded

Sme: Let me speak to Siya first then get back to you

Faith: Ok, l don't mean to rush you but it's sort of urgent as l don't have a place to sleep khona namhlanje

Sme: Ok, let me call him

(Zandie worked out what was going on from our conversation)

Zandie: Mfazi, l don't mean to pry but don't you think it's a bad time to have a relative staying with you when you guys are going through a rough patch?

Sme: I know it's not ideal, but ngeke ngimyeke elala estradeni mina ngikhona. And maybe an extra person will get us talking again cos we hardly ever talk anymore. You know with other couples that are going through a rough patch, you hear them saying bahlanginiswa ngabantwana, that's the only conversation they ever have. Manje thina we don't have them, so there is very little  that forces us to converse. 

Zandie: I hear you mfazi, but watch out, your cousin is very wild. She might add more trouble to your troubles.

Sme: Let's hope she won't, and anyway she said she will be moving at the beginning of next month, so she will only be with us for two weeks

Zandie: Ok

I called Siya to let him know about Faith's request, and he just said "ok". Usually Siya would make a joke if a relative was coming to visit, be it a relative from his side or mine. He would say something like "if they overstay, we will chase them away by having loud rampant sex", or "we can tell them that we have a holiday booked for the whole week, that way they would be forced to go". But none of these would work on Faith because first of all we were not having any sex, even if we did, Faith would tell us to keep it down next time and if we said we had a holiday to go to, she would definitely tell us to enjoy and extend it if we wanted to, we will find her waiting. It's something l just thought to myself, I missed my husband, I wished he would say something funny like he always did in these situations, but he just coldly said "ok". You know things are very wrong if you miss someone who lives under the same roof as you. 

I found Faith waiting for me by the door when l arrived home after work. She had a small suitcase, a tshangan bag and two overnight bags. Forever blunt, Faith told Siya that he looked like someone who had emerged from a hole and that he needed to shave and eat something when he arrived home. Siya laughed an awkward laugh and went to warm up his food. That was the first time I had heard him laugh in a long time. When he came to the living room where Faith and l were, Faith got up from where she was sitting and went to the single recliner, so Siya had no choice but to sit next to me. Faith talked about anything and everything engaging both me and Siya in her conversations. It was good to hear him speak even though it wasn't about our problems, nje ukuthi he was making conversation was good. Hopefully he would eventually talk about what was going on. He went to bed shortly after eating, I went to join him. He held me in his arms as we spooned for the first time after the weeks and weeks of sleeping alone and apart. I was pleasantly surprised. Maybe having Faith over was going to be a blessing in disguise! 

Umendo Chapter 40

Umendo Chapter 40

At work I called Siya a few times to check up on him, l wanted to reassure him that l was going to stand by him through it all like l had promised when we got married. He sounded down, I really wished l could take away some of his worries so he wouldn't have to carry so much by himself. I thought about asking him to visit the men's clinic, but then decided to wait a while. I mean it had only happened once, well several times in one day, so maybe things would go back to normal when we tried again. And l didn't want him to feel like l was putting more pressure on him after just one fail, so unless he brought it up, l was going to keep my suggestion on hold for a while longer. Then there was the issue of my mother in law, I told Siya when l called him and he asked me not to give her my aunt's number, he was going to talk to her. So l left it there, I understood how sensitive this was for him, so l thought it was best that he handled it his way. 

That afternoon at work l received a single rose with a note saying "I can't get you out of my mind", it was the same writing as the one on that last note that came with flowers from an anonymous admirer. Usathane yisilingo ngempela, l chucked it into the bin and went back to work. Mike and Langa gave me those inquisitive eyes but I didn't indulge them. At home after we had our dinner, l gave Siya a massage hoping it would relax him and hopefully reduce his stress. In bed that night he made the first move, I responded, but it was yet another flop. Siya got out of bed after the failure to launch and went to watch TV at midnight. I followed him but he told me to go back to bed he was going to join me soon. I didn't push it by trying to talk to him or being all mushy, I kissed him and went to bed. I couldn't sleep though, I tossed and turned thinking of what ifs. Around 2am l went to check up on Siya and he had fallen asleep on the sofa, I put a blanket on him and switched off the TV. For the first ever ngalala ngedwa kodwa uSiya ekhona. Whenever he pissed me off, l would tell him to sleep in the spare bedroom but he would refuse and come sleep with me, so l would leave and go sleep in there myself but he always followed me until l gave up. So that night felt a bit weird, what if life as l knew it was going to change forever because of this? That was a scary thought for me. 

Over the next couple of weeks things didn't get any better, Siya was sleeping on the sofa watching TV most of the time. Damn that TV, whenever l called him to come to bed, he would say he is coming, but not come at all or come around 4 or 5 in the morning. If he did go to bed with me, he would sleep right on the edge of the bed ngani angaze awe embhedeni, you could fit a bus in between him and l. If l tried to get closer to him khona wayengavele awele phansi. The conversations had gone stale, it was as if we didn't know each other anymore. We usually argued whenever our favourite programmes clashed, but Siya let me watch even when there was soccer on. Even on the sofa, he would sit on the single recliner to avoid cosying up next to me as we always did. It felt like we were an old married couple, maybe layo old married couple ize ibengcono cos they have a few things to talk about. Me and Siya on the other hand, hayi shem. It was time to confront the elephant in the room, and boy was it a huge elephant! 

We were watching Khumbul 'eKhaya when that advert about the men's clinic came on. After it finished playing, l muted the TV

Sme: Siya, maybe you need to visit the men's clinic. 

Siya: (zwi yena, no eye contact)

Sme: We cannot ignore this forever baby, I don't mean to put pressure on you or anything, but I think you should go and get help

Siya: Ok

Sme: Does that mean you will go?

Siya: Yes

Sme: Ok, do you want me to go with you?

Siya: No

Sme: Ok, let me know if you change your mind

Siya: Ok

Sme: Did you call umama?

Siya: Mayelana ngani?

Sme: Angithi you said you were going to talk to her when she called to ask for my aunt's number?

Siya: Did she call you again?

Sme: No, l was just wondering

Siya: Then there is no need just yet

Sme: Siya, don't shut me out, I'm just trying to help here. 

Siya: I'm sure you are relieved aren't you?

Sme: Relieved about what?

Siya: That it's not you ongazaliyo. That must have felt good when we found out that I'm the one shooting blanks 

Sme: Hawu Siyabonga

Siya: Ngamanga yini?Were you not relieved (now he had turned to look at me)

Sme: Siya....

Siya: Exactly, you cannot tell me you weren't cos that would be a lie. 

Sme: No Siya, l wasn't because it still affects us both.

Siya: But now it means you can leave me and be with someone who can give you children. Ngubani ongafuna ukuhlalela indoda engazaliyo, vele akula zabudoda if ungazali. It's my punishment l guess

Sme: Siya, leaving you hasn't even crossed my mind

Siya: Manga!

Sme: And punishment for what?

Siya: For cheating. That moment of weakness brought nothing but trouble in our lives. And because of that, l killed my own father! 

Sme: Hawu Siya, where is all this coming from?

Siya: Just admit it, you all think it but won't say it out loud. My father had a stroke because he was stressed about me, first of all because l cheated and supposedly impregnanted that girl, then that same girl's mother nearly got me killed. Had l not cheated, my father would have never had a stroke, therefore he would still be alive today (zahlengezela inyembezi) 

Sme: (I knelt in front of him and held his hands which were shaking) Baby, don't think like that. Ubab'uNkomo ubesekhulile, no one blames you for his death. And as for this, it's not like you have a child or two already and then usuzama futhi but kwehlula. No one is punishing you. The doctor said you have a low sperm count, therefore our chances of conceiveng are low, he didn't say it was entirely impossible. We can't lose hope without trying. 

 He got up, went to his car and locked himself inside: he was still crying. I knocked on the car window but he wouldn't open. Eventually l left him there and went to bed, ngalala umqamelo umanzi. I felt helpless, I couldn't help my husband whom l could tell was in a lot of pain inside. I really wished he could share his burdens with me, let me in and let me help him, but he was pushing me further and further away from him. What does one do in a situation like this? 

Umendo Chapter 39

Umendo Chapter 39

Most people confuse a low sperm count with a small amount if semen, so did Siya. He asked the doctor if that meant he was not producing enough sperms when ejaculating. He explained to him that he produces enough semen, but the amount of sperms in the semen was low. For example, an average sample of semen contains up to 200 million sperms, Siya's contained less than 40 million sperms. Of those 40 million, 30 million were slow swimmers, leaving him with about 10 million healthy ones. So instead of 200 million sperms swimming towards the ovaries to the eggs, he had 10 million , and that is a very low number in fertility terms. He told him to start taking vitamin supplements, eat more healthy foods, reduce his alcohol intake and exercise regularly. He also advised that we cut down on sex and do it no more than twice a week in order to increase the sperm count when ejaculating. I reckoned that part wasn't going to be easy, but l was determined, and l hoped Siya was on the same page as l. 

We bought the vitamin supplements after the appointment, and l bought loads of fish, fruits and vegetables. I wanted us to talk openly about what this meant and what we were going to do together to increase our chances of conceiving, but Siya seemed detached. He didn't want to talk about it at all, whenever l brought it up, he would say one thing then move on to something else. I ended up leaving it alone and told him that we could conquer anything, so long we worked together as a team. Three days later l received a call from Nicole, l had a lot going on that l had forgotten about her. She called to let me know that she had found a job at a hotel and she was going to start training in a couple of days. She sounded excited and l was genuinely happy for her. She told me that she was going to be paid R3 800/ month, so she had made some calculations and figured she would be able to pay me back all my money in 6months time if everything went well. The following day, l decided to do a romantic dinner for me and Siya. I left work early to start preparing before Siya arrived home. He arrived when l was placing the candles on the dining table. He gave me a kiss, then lit the candles whilst l dished our dinner. We had smoked salmon and baked parmesan potatoes. For desert we had cheesecake with a fresh cream and chocolate sauce. "This is why l married you", my husband said as we finished eating. I laughed and said "l thought you married me for my looks", to which he replied "that too and a hundred more other things". 

We had not had any 'coitus' since we got Siya's results back, we were 'banking the sperm' as that doctor had put it. It was hard to sleep next to each other everyday and starve ourselves of coitus, but it was all for the best. But tonight was the night and l had been looking forward to it. Around 10pm, l left Siya watching TV and went to put on some sexy lingerie that l had bought two days earlier in preparation for this night. We have an alarm clock radio on our bedside cabinet which supports USB, so l connected my phone to the radio and made a quick nice and slow playlist. I played the first song Sexual Healing by Marving Gaye and called my husband to come join me. Hehhh, the look on his face, he couldn't stop smiling as he stripped down to his underwear and enjoyed watching me give him a lap dance. Needless to say, that all got him worked up, seeing him excited got me excited as well. He got up with his manhood poking and kissed me with so much passion, my arms carresed his bare back. He turned me sound and unhooked the bra part of the sexy night dress and planted small kisses on my back going up to my neck. He then turned me to face him and pulled my nightie down slowly whilst planting small soft kisses on my shoulders, neck, boobs and back to my mouth. I was ready for him, l couldn't wait any longer, l was hungry to feel him inside me, so l pulled his undies down and pulled him towards we both fell on the bed. He got on top of me, l opened my legs as wide as they could go and said "let's make a baby". Bad mistake because my husband suddenly went soft on me. He tried to enter me whilst soft, but it was an epic fail! He looked surprised and disappointed just like me but l tried not to show my disappointment. I pulled him in my arms and told him not to worry about it. He kept apologising saying that he didn't know why that had happened. Around 1am he woke me up probing me with his hard on, usually l'm reluctant when Siya wakes me up for a second round in the middle of the night, l just prefer the morning glory, but that night I was happy he woke me up. We both got all worked up, he got inside me, thrust two three times and went soft. This time he asked me to give him a hand job, l did, he got hard, three to four thrust and went flaccid yet again. He wanted to try gain but l told him to not worry about and that we were going to try in the morning. I could tell he was very worried because he tossed and turned the rest of the night. I reckoned he was thinking way too much into it, and the pressure of impregnanting me was way too much for him. Now not being able to perform in bed and satisfy me in bed definitely bruised his ego as a man and he took it hard. We tried again in the morning to no avail, he would get worked up, then just go soft either before he entered me or after a few thrusts. I kissed him and told him that everything was going to be alright as we both left for work. 

At work that morning, l received a call from my mother in law asking for my aunt's number so that they could arrange a meeting to discuss Siya's options were since l couldn't bare him a child!

Umendo Chapter 38

Umendo Chapter 38

We didn't know if Lumkile had something to do with the missing dockets, even if we she did, there was nothing we could have done about it. It was frustrating, especially for my husband because he would have to come face to face with these people soon enough since they hang around in the same places. I feared that he might lose his temper when he came face to face with them and this time they could kill him knowing that they can get away with it. So much for justice! Over the next few weeks, Siya was looking much better, he was called in for two more fertility test after the initial one. I could tell that he was worried, l think what worried him the most was that he thought if he couldn't give me children, l would leave him. 

One afternoon at work l received a message from my bank that my account had been deposited with R35 000. It was from Lumkile, but this time she didn't send any message.  That evening l got a call from Nicole crying

Sme: Kutheni Nicole? 

Nicole: My mum gave Junior away

Sme: Huh? She did what?

Nicole: She called me two days ago asking me if l really wanted to make amends. I told her that l wanted that more than anything, she said she was coming to visit so we could talk. She came to my place this morning, she was so nice to me and she said that she was taking me home with her. She then sent me to the shops to buy bin bags to put my stuff in, l left her with Junior. When l got back she was gone with my baby, l called her and she told me not to worry as she was on her way back. She said that she had gone to sort out 'our' problem. She came back without Junior, when l asked her where he was, she told me that she left him at Door Of Hope. ( Door of Hope is an opharnage in Berea, there is a big metal box on the wall that looks like a huge bread bin. So people dump their unwanted babies there without having to reveal their identity) 

Sme: Oh nkosi yami, why didn't you go to ask for your baby back?

Nicole: I did, but they told me that they will call social workers to deal with this whole issue. They will have to come to assess where l live to see if it's fit for a baby, and obviously l will fail ngoba ngihlala ekhethenini, l'm a single teenage mother, l don't have a job, l don't have any adult helping me take care of my baby. My mum won't let me tell them l live with her because she doesn't want me to get my baby back, in fact she said if they ask her if she thinks l am a fit mother she will tell them that l'm a party animal and l see Junior as something that's getting in my way of having fun which is why l dumped him at The Door Of Hope. Which is all lies because l haven't been out every since l got pregnant, l love my baby, l wouldn't dream of spending a day without him, let alone give him away. But who is going to believe a single teenage mother over an adult who is an officer of law and a 'respected' member of the community? 

Sme: Eish, manje what are you going to do?

Nicole: l don't know, l'm going crazy right now. I know it's too much to ask, but could you please help me with a place to stay until l get my baby back. 

Sme: I wish l could help Nicole, but you cannot move in with us. Things will be too awkward, and l don't think my husband would agree anyway

Nicole: No, l didn't mean moving in with you. I only receive R300 grant per month for Junior and it doesn't even cover my current R500 rent. I sold my phone and bought a cheaper one to pay this month's rent. If l could get a bachelor flat for a month or two whilst they are assessing my situation, l know it will increase my chances of getting Junior back. Then l can find a cheaper place afterwards. I have no one else to turn to

Sme: So you want me to deposit a bachelor flat for you, then pay your rent until you get your son back? 

Nicole: l will look for a job and pay you back every penny, l will start searching from tomorrow. Hopefully l will get it ASAP and work full time then reduce to part time after l get my baby back

Sme: Eyi Nicole, that's a bit much. Let me talk to my husband about it

Nicole: Thank you, and please let me know if you hear of a place they are looking for people, angikhethi. I will do anything, l just want my baby back....Could you please borrow me some money for marketing. 

Sme: I'll keep an ear out for you. l will let you know where to meet me after work. 

Later that afternoon, l met Nicole in Sandton mall, she had lost so much weight. Her clothes were baggy, amehlo ewele phakathi, her hands were ashy l had to buy her some Vaseline before she left. She was devasted about losing Junior, she cried when she told me that she was being punished for what she did to me. I gave her R400, she went to print out her CV and l headed home. I knew Siya wouldn't agree to all this but l had to tell him anyway. I felt sorry for Nicole, even though she had terrorised me, l knew she loved her son and would have done anything for him. But l told myself that if my husband refused ukuthi simncede, l wouldn't feel too guilty because at least he had a roof over his head and wasn't going to sleep hungry. Even though it wasn't an ideal circumstance, it was much better than living under a bridge. Siya was already home when l arrived, he seemed anxious and nervous. He told me that he had a received a call that the results of his semen were ready. He had made an appointment for the next afternoon, l volunteered to join him for the results. I didn't bring up the Nicole issue because he was tense, it would have to wait for a less stressful day. 

The following day Siya came to pick me up at work just before lunch time, his hands were sweating even though it was cold. We didn't say much on our way there, just small talk. I wished l could tell him not to worry, that everything was going to be just fine, but was it? Waiting outside to be called seemed to take forever, when we were finally called in, l held Siya hand and we walked in. The doctor was so blunt and didn't beat about the bush, he said "Right, the results show that you have low sperm count and most of your sperms are slow swimmers. What this means is that your chances of conceiving are less than 15%"

Umendo Chapter 37

Umendo Chapter 37

 

Siya explained to me how Mapetla had called him enquiring about driving lessons. He told him that he wanted them for his niece, so a few days later he introduced Nicole as the niece who wanted lessons. So the guy had actually picked out Siya for Nicole to pin the pregnancy on. Pity the baby is an exact replica of him. 

Sme: So how does that make you feel?

Siya: Stupid, how could l have been so stupid?

Sme: No, l am talking about the baby not being yours?

Siya: Relieved, that girl brought nothing but trouble in our lives

Sme: No, you brought her into our lives, nobody forced you to have an affair with her

Siya: It wasn't an affair bantu. Anyway, l'm glad this whole thing is over and done with. 

Sme: Now you have to go and get checked Siya. You cannot dodge it forever. We need to know if there is a problem ukuze sikwazi how to deal with it

Siya: Vele kusho khona ukuba the problem lies with me. You have been to check ups and they said everything is ok, now Nicole's baby is not mine. It's pretty clear now

Sme: We will never know until you get checked

Siya: So what will happen ? When the results say that l cannot have children, what will happen to us? 

Sme: l don't know. (I had never really thought that far,l guess l always assumed that there would be something we could do)

Siya: l am tired, l'm going to lie down for a few hours (The look on his face, it was as if his balls had been cut off) 

I prepared dinner and sat down to catch up with my recorded programmes. I received a message from Nicole that her mum agreed that she could come back home, but only if she gives her baby away. She said that she didn't want to give her baby away, but she also wanted to have a good relationship with her mother. Eish nkosi yami, ngazithela shem. I told her that if she gave up her baby, she would regret it for the rest of her life and that this was her chance to do something right after all the mistakes and poor choices she had made. I woke up Siya for dinner, we had a long talk after l finished clearing up. Eventually he agreed to get a check up, then we would take everything from there. I updated him on everything that happened whilst he was in hospital, and he listened to his father's message. For the first time since hearing about ubab'uNkomo's passing, he cried. I held him in silence until he stopped crying. We retired to bed around midnight, it was nice to sleep next to my husband again. Siya holds me in his arms everytime we sleep, but that night, l held him until we both fell asleep. 

I woke up early and made Siya breakfast in bed, it was a bit chilly, so he was happy to stay in bed all morning. After breakfast l joined him in bed and Siya started getting touchy feely. I wanted us to wait until he was physically stronger, l was scared he might have a heart attack or something during the act. I told him about my worries, but he tried to assure me, I still wasn't convinced. Problem with Siya is he can be quite persuasive, like l mentioned earlier on, he would follow me everywhere like a hungry baby until l gave in. So most of the times l don't even bother denying him because l know he will annoy me till l get tired and give in. I eventually agreed on the basis that l was going to be on top, that way l would control the pace and he wouldn't have to do much work. It was beautiful, l grinded on his manhood nice and softly with my eyes closed, it felt like magic. I briefly opened my eyes to look at Siya and he had his eyes closed and was smiling with his mouth open, l guess he was feeling it too. We both climaxed and l fell onto his chest with his now soft manhood still inside me. I tried to get off him as l remembered his wounds, but he pulled he right back and wrapped his arms around me. And to think Lumkile wanted rip all this away from me! Mnxxx

We spent most of the day cosied up in bed, we only got up to shower together in the late afternoon. Siya helped me make dinner, l wanted him to sit down and relax. I think l feared that he would feel dizzy and fall again from all the standing, but he was keen on getting back to his normal routine. We spent the rest of the day snuggled on the sofa watching TV. That Sunday l attended Siya's church, l know l sound paranoid, but l just wanted to make sure he was fine. Nothing had changed at Siya's church, well there were even more people now, but 80% of the service was still "turn to the person next to you and say....". I told Siya to put his turns on hold until his wound on the neck healed. With that much turning he was guaranteed a couple more days in hospital. 

I went back to work the following day, Siya wanted to but l told him that he need to relax for at least another week before going back to work to give his body time to recover. He didn't like hearing that, he said he was going to stay home five days tops, and he was only doing it for me, if it was up to him, he would have gone back that same Monday. Siya booked an appointment at the men's clinic for that Wednesday. Thursday was supposed to be the start of the trial of the guys who stabbed Siya, but I received a call from our lawyer saying that the dockets had gone 'missing', so the trial was cancelled and those guys were going to be released! 

Umendo Chapter 35

Umendo Chapter 35

 

My cousin helped me pack as she had promised. We met up with Zandie later in the afternoon to go visit Siya. I hadn't told my cousin that Zandie was in the dark about me helping Nicole, so she mentioned in passing how Nicole had been brought down to earth and how she had been forced to turn to me for help. I tried to wink at my cousin, ngazama ukumqhweba, but she just pushed my hand away and continued rambling on

Zandie: Huh? Ini? (Zandie looked at me confused)

Noe: She called uMeme again yesterday when her baby wouldn't stop crying

Zandie: Again?? Am l missing something? Is this the same Nicole who tried to destroy your life? (Mina zwi)

Noe: Yena kanye! > Yep, none other than her!

Zandie: Meme? Why? Why ?

Sme: Mfazi, l couldn't let her sleep under a bridge with a week old baby. What if the baby died? I would have never forgiven myself knowing that she came to me for help and l pushed her away. 

Zandie: (Clap once and shakes her head) And l take it you didn't tell me any of this cos you knew l wouldn't go along with this bullshit? 

Sme: I'm sorry mfazi l didn't tell you, but l just couldn't 

Zandie: l know my friend. Your kindness is a blessing and a curse at the same time. I hope it doesn't come back to bite you. 

Siya was sitting on a chair and reading a newspaper when we arrived. He looked stronger than he actually was. I think he was trying to look like he was better so he could leave the hospital. My cousin started to talk about about Nicole, eish, that one also. Me and Zandie pinched her so hard this time she got the message and quickly changed the topic. Siya asked if she had given birth, l told him that she had given birth to a baby boy. I didn't want to tell him about Junior not being his just yet, he had a lot on his plate already. He didn't need more bad news just yet. I had already asked Buhle to speak to MaMoyo and ask her to not mention anything to Siya about the baby. She agreed and later told me it was sorted. Siya said that he was going to get a paternity test when he got back from the funeral. Having to lie to my husband like that killed me, l was sweating and couldn't keep eye contact. I felt like he could see that l was lying, so l quickly changed the topic. I now understood why sometimes people close to you would lie to protect you. 

We flew out on Wednesday morning, l held Siya and would let got of him because l was scared he might fall. He looked much better, but l didn't want to take the chance. Whenever he fell asleep, l checked him regularly to make sure he was still breathing. We went over to my parents' first, I knew that if we went straight to Siya's, l wouldn't be able to leave until the funeral was over. I didn't want people to say "umakoti ubalekela umsebenzi". My parents were very happy to see us as always, my mother prayed for Siya's health, for his father to rest in peace and for Siya's family and our marriage. I borrowed their car and went with my younger twin sister Tasha. My parents and my other twin sister Nelisa were going to join us on Thursday . Ubab'uNkomo was going to be buried in Gwanda, his home where he grew up, so they were going to drive with us there. When we arrived there were so many cars parked outside, we had to ask one of the neighbours to park in their house. There were so many people, ubab'uNkomo was clearly loved and respected by many. We spent a good hour meeting and greeting, half of the people there either knew my parents, or they had grown up with one of my relatives, and apparently l was related to most people there. You know how our elders always find a family connection down the line through surnames. Tasha went straight to Bongiwe as soon as we arrived. Most people told me to stay strong for Siya because he needed me now more than ever. I dreaded going to greet uMaMoyo, she was sat inside the living room with her two sisters and one of her aunts (ubab'uNkomo's younger sister uMaxesha). She was wrapped in blankets and looked defeated. I knelt and greeted them one by one. UMaxesha gave me a hand shake ekhangele eceleni as if l had a bad breath or something, then asked where Siya was. I guess she too felt the same way as uMaMoyo. Yena uMaMoyo she barely touched my hand when stretched it out to greet her. Maxesha who got the name because after she spent 2 weeks in Capetown, she would stand up in church and say "ndithanda ukthatha ixesha leli" everytime, I'm sure she still does even today. Anyhow, Maxesha had always been nice to me, she used to say that l was going to keep the Nkomo name alive, therefore keep her memory alive. So l'm sure after MaMoyo told her that l was barren, l shattered her dreams. 

Salala silindele with ubab'uNkomo biding goodbye for the last time in his home. It was a wonderful service. People sang, drank and danced in celebration of his life and the memories he had left us, some just drank because it was free alcohol. You know there is always those people who will attend anything as long as they serve free alcohol. It was the same here. I kept checking on Siya, or sending someone to check up on him if I was busy with something. I cooked, cleaned, washed up, served and helped with sleeping arrangements for those who couldn't stay up all night. By morning l was knackered and just wanted to have a bath and sleep. I decided to quickly dash to my house, the one my parents helped me buy in Cowdraypark which is just next to eMakhandeni and take a bath. I went with Bongiwe and Tasha. We were back in less than an hour. When we arrived some people told me that Siya had been looking for me, l found him speaking to one of the uncles. The way he looked at me, it was as if he was looking at something disgusting, something he couldn't stand being around. When he finished speaking to his uncle he came over to me and said "How could you refuse to give my mother imali to help out with the funeral? And ukuxosha umama endlini Meme? How could you be so cruel?" 

Umendo Chapter 34

Umendo Chapter 34

He was breathing, so l put him in the recovery position and lifted his chin forward to open his airways. He regained consciousness when I was trying to position him properly. He was a bit confused at first, then he realised what had happened. The cut at the top corner of his eye was not so bad, so he wasn't losing a lot of blood, l held a cloth onto it whilst l called Francis to come back. I knew that an ambulance would take forever to come. Siya told me that he had gotten up to take the plate back to the kitchen when everything went woozy, so he fell and hit the corner of the coffee table with the corner of his eye, then onto to the floor. He barely missed his eye. Francis got back in less than 15 minutes because he hadn't driven far, but it felt like l had been waiting for hours. Siya was reluctant about going to hospital, he kept saying that he was just a bit dizzy and would be fine, but l reminded him that it's better to be safe than sorry.  Francis drove us to the MediClinic in Morningside. The doctor insisted on admitting Siya for a few days so that he could get all the necessary help to fully recover, but Siya was adamant about going to his father's funeral. I called back home to find out if they had set a date for the funeral. I found out that it had been set for Thursday, so l convinced Siya to stay in hospital until Wednesday. He agreed, so we were going to leave on  Wednesday morning.

After he had settled in, l went home to pack. I took a week off work as part of my 6 weeks leave per year. I was very lucky to work with someone like Mike who is so understanding. I felt a bit guilty though because my personal life had been affecting my work lately. Mike understood because he himself had had a rough year a couple of years earlier when he openly declared that he is gay. I was there for him and often worked our projects alone whilst he was dealing with the different problems he was going through. Whilst l was packing, l got a call from Nicole panicking. Junior had been crying non stop for two days and his temperature was very high. She begged me to help her, yet again. I asked her why she didn't call her aunt or someone else not me, she said that her aunt wasn't picking up her calls because she probably assumed that she was calling to beg for a place to stay. Her mother was still not speaking to her, so l was 'her last hope' as she put it. I went to pick up my cousin Nokuthaba first, then we went over to Nicole's. I didn't want to be around her alone, she could cry wolf for all l knew. So if l had someone else, they would be my witness and alibi if ever l needed it. Nicole looked like she hadn't slept for days,Junior was wailing when we arrived and he was boiling hot. We drove to the hospital. It seemed l couldn't stay away from hospitals lately. It turned out Junior had a fever and an ear infection.  We got his prescriptions and l drove back to Berea. I told Nicole to go straight to the clinic next time if she thought something was wrong with the baby. I felt sorry for her because she knew nothing about caring for a baby, she was still a child herself. Lumkile only had her, so she never had any younger siblings to help take care of, so she had been thrown right into the deep end when she had her baby. Ukuphapha konke kwasekuphelile, she now seemed down to earth and more mature. I guess its true that having children changes most people. My cousin invited me to stay for supper, l think Nicole thought the invite was for both of us cos she immidiately thanked my cousin and said it would be nice to sit down and talk to people for a change. When we got to my cousin's, Nicole asked me to hold Junior whilst she went to the toilet. Looking at him,  l thought about how much l wanted a baby of my own. The thought of the possibility that I could die without a child of my own  brought  tears to my eyes. Junior must have been tired from all the crying and not having any proper sleep for days because he fell asleep straight away in my arms. I laid him down and we went to help Noe prepare super. 

Noe: So...., Nicole..., did you think you could snatch Meme's husband away from her? 

Sme: Hayi Noe, there is no need. Sokwadlula

Nicole: No it's fine Meme, I deserve it. In fact, l deserve far much worse after what l did to you. You didn't deserve any of that

Noe: What was your plan vele? Did you and your mother plan to arrest Meme so you could move in with her husband?

Nicole: I didn't plan anything with my mum, she got home that night and told me that l was moving in with Siya. I didn't exactly want to move into your house Meme, l wanted a place of my own. Mapetla had agreed to get me a flat and pay for it, l was going to tell my mum that Siya was paying for it, but my mum kept pushing me to move in with Siya. 

Noe: Did you love this Mapetla guy or was it all for money?

Nicole: I grew to love him. I had know him for nearly six years, l grew very fond of him. He always made me laugh. My mum caught him staring at me a few times, l think that's why she desperately wanted me to move out.

Sme: Do you think she will forgive you anytime soon? 

Nicole: l don't know, maybe she never will. My mum always spoke about how life was going to change for the best when Mapetla finally left his wife. During the first few years, my mum wanted a baby so bad, but Mapetla kept convincing her to wait until he left his wife so they could start a proper family. So you can imagine how hurt she was when she found out about Junior. The chances of her having a baby now are close to none, same as the chances of her forgiving me. I would understand if she never forgives me, l'm sure seeing Junior will always be a reminder of how l betrayed her. And it doesn't help that he looks exactly like Mapetla.

Noe: Khona vele why did you betray her like that? 

Nicole: l don't know, it just happened. Everytime we slept together we swore it was the last, but we couldn't stop. 

Sme: Do you love uSiya?

Nicole: No, not really. I never got to know him enough to love him. 

Noe: So you were prepared to live with someone you didn't love? 

Nicole: I told myself that l was going to learn to love him, he seems like a nice guy, and he has a great body. 

Sme: (l cleared my throat) Ok. Let's leave that there. 

Nicole: I am so sorry Meme, you are the kindest person l know. I regret ever coming between you and your husband, and the pain l have caused you. I regret it everyday. 

After we had our supper, we walked Nicole to her flat. My cousin begged me to sleep over at hers. I tried to tell her that l had to pack and get ready for ukuya ekhaya, she said she was going to go with me the next day and help me pack. I ran out of excuses, so l ended up sleeping there.